Puns

121+ Pandemic Puns Humorous Relief in Difficult Times

Pandemic Puns
Written by Hilly Martin

The COVID-19 pandemic has left us all feeling stressed, anxious and overwhelmed. During tough times like these, it’s important to take a moment to take a deep breath and find something that can bring a smile to our faces. Humor is a great coping mechanism and one of the best ways to lighten the mood. And what better way to do that than with some witty pandemic puns? In this article, we’ve compiled over pandemic puns that are sure to give you a chuckle, even in the midst of these challenging times.

What are Pandemic Puns?

Pandemic puns are a type of wordplay that’s been created in response to the COVID-19 pandemic. They typically poke fun at the unprecedented situation we find ourselves in and often incorporate COVID-19 related terminology such as social distancing, self-quarantine, and face masks. These puns are meant to bring joy and humor to an otherwise difficult situation, and provide a much-needed break from the constant stream of negative news.

Best Short Pandemic Puns

  • Washing my hands so much they’re starting to write their memoirs – Joke.
  • Quarantine hair, don’t care! – Humorous.
  • Stay at home, save lives – Catchy.
  • I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right from 2 meters away – Sarcastic.
  • Masks on, minds sharp! – Encouraging.
  • I long for the good old days so I can stay inside all day – Ironical.
  • Life is short, stay 6 feet apart – Witty.
  • The world may be going viral, but kindness is contagious too. – Inspirational.
  • Social distancing: I’ve been training for this my whole life! – Relatable.
  • Mask up! It’s the neighborly thing to do – Encouraging.
  • My social life is spreading more than my germs lately – Self-deprecating.
  • My quarantine schedule: Homelife, Home work, Home workouts – Commendable.
  • Stay home and believe in tomorrow – Motivating.
  • The only distance between us should be our dance moves – Romantic.
  • Quarantine calories don’t count, right? – Humorous.
  • I’m practicing social distancing from my fridge – Ironical.
  • Emoji prediction for 2020.
  • The best thing about social distancing? My dog thinks I’m the greatest! – Heartwarming.
  • A world without hugs is not a world I want to live in – Emotional.
  • The only thing that’s spreading faster than COVID-19 is misinformation – True.
  • Six feet apart, but still in my heart – Sentimental.
  • Stuck inside? It’s time to Netflix and quarantine! – Timely.
  • I’m fine-tuning my social distancing technique – Relatable.
  • My new favorite color is socially distant blue – Creative.
  • Approaching people in real life is so last year, virtual is the new thing! – Trendy.
Best Short Pandemic Puns

One-liner Pandemic Puns

  • My hands are so dry from washing them that I might start a forest fire.
  • Quarantine would be a lot more fun without the “quarant” part.
  • If we’re not careful, we might end up with a “pandammit” instead of a pandemic.
  • I used to spin the bottle, now I spin the sanitizer.
  • All I do these days is “contemplaternize” – contemplate, ventilate, sanitize.
  • My mask protects you, your mask protects me, but my sarcasm protects us both.
  • I’ve been training for social distancing my whole life – I’m a pro!
  • Life is too short, but six feet is just right.
  • My fashion sense these days is either “quaran-chic” or “just got out of bed”.
  • I’m not procrastinating, I’m social distancing from my responsibilities.
  • Six feet apart? That’s just two arm’s lengths for an octopus!
  • The only thing spreading faster than the virus is “coronaphobia”.
  • I never thought I’d miss socializing so much that I’d start calling my groceries “my people”.
  • Being indoors for so long has turned me into a “quarantween”.
  • When I leave the house, it’s a “sanitizer-salesman” look for me.
  • Let’s all “flatten the curve” while maintaining our sense of humor.
  • I wish my internet speed was as fast as the spread of the virus.
  • My new year’s resolution was to travel more. Now, I’m traveling from my bedroom to my living room.
  • My mask is my new best friend. It goes wherever I go.
  • My hands are so clean that I’m starting to see my future in them.
  • I never thought my “pandemic bod” would rival my college days.
  • Six feet apart and still in my heart – true love in the age of COVID-19.
  • I’m practicing social distancing so much that I’m considering becoming a hermit.
  • I never thought I’d miss small talk so much that I’d start talking to myself.
  • I’m so bored that I’m starting to read the nutrition labels on my snacks.

Funny Puns about Pandemic

  • Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the social distancing line.
  • What do you call a person who doesn’t wear a mask? A Mask-erade!
  • Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing and screamed “Oh my, COVID-19!”
  • What do you call a sheep that’s always sick? The “shepherd herd”.
  • How do you organize a party during a pandemic? You plan a zoom-ba party.
  • What do you call a person who hoards toilet paper? A “bathroom bandit”.
  • Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a “hole in one”
  • What do you call a polite, friendly pandemic? A “virus with manners”.
  • Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta away.
  • What do you call a bear with COVID-19? A Pandammit.
  • Why did the banana get tested for COVID-19? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  • What do you call a pirate during a pandemic? A quaran-teen.
  • Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda-pressing.
  • What kind of music do viruses listen to? Rap-idemic.
  • What do you call a person who always wears a mask? A masquerade artist.
  • Why did the chicken join the Zoom meeting? To talk to its other poultry pals.
  • What do you call a seafood restaurant during a pandemic? A shellfish place.
  • Why did the snail put on a mask? To keep its slimy trail to itself.
  • What do you call a person who wears their mask below their nose? A nostril-nudger.
  • What do you call a singing group that practices social distancing? The “harmoni-six feet”.
  • Why did the tomato refuse to wear a mask? It couldn’t ketchup with the trend.
  • What do you call a dog during a pandemic? A “quaran-terrier”.
  • Why did the musician refuse to perform during the pandemic? They didn’t want to risk catching a “tune”.
  • What do you call a person who is always anxious about the pandemic? A “hygiene-maniac”.
  • Why did the chicken get into trouble for breaking social distancing rules? Because it didn’t follow the “pecking” order.
Best Short Pandemic Puns

Pandemic Puns for Kids

  • What do you call a cat that’s always bored? A “felin-everyday” cat.
  • Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many “problems”.
  • What do you get when you cross a snowman with a shark? Frostbite!
  • Why did the teddy bear say “no” to dessert? Because it was stuffed.
  • What kind of hat do birds wear in winter? “tweet” caps.
  • Why did the hummingbird stop at the flower shop? It needed to “beak-a-boo”.
  • What did the grape say when it got stepped on? “Nothing, it just let out a little wine”.
  • Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It was feeling a little “crummy”.
  • What do you call a dinosaur that’s always upset? A “cry-saurus”.
  • What do you call a pig that does karate? A “pork chop”.
  • Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing and became embarrassed.
  • What did one math book say to the other math book? “I’ve got problems”.
  • What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment!
  • Why is the letter “G” so cool? Because it’s “always chillin'”.
  • What do you give a dog with a fever? Mustard, it’s the best thing for a hot dog.
  • Why did the bread go see a doctor? It had a bad “yeast” infection.
  • What do you call an alligator that wears a vest? An investigator.
  • Why did the frog call his insurance company? He had a jumping problem.
  • What do you call an elephant in a telephone booth? Stuck.
  • Why did the bike fall over? It was two-tired.
  • What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
  • What do you call a ghost that lives in a tree? A “boo-bark” ghost.
  • What did the grape say to the big bad wolf? “Don’t eat me, I’m sour!”
  • What did one elevator say to the other elevator? “I think I’m coming down with something.”
  • What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman? Frostbite.

Good Pandemic Puns use in Movies

COVID-19 has not only impacted our daily lives but also our entertainment choices. The success of movies and TV shows, such as Outbreak, Contagion, and Songbird, prove that we are drawn to stories about pandemics. Here are five pandemic puns used in movies that you might recognize.

  • Knocked Up (2007): “Honestly, I just want to catch a movie, have dinner. It’s not like I’m asking to get Ebola or something.”
  • Bad Boys for Life (2020): “You would think that Miami would be able to handle all of this. But they can’t. We ain’t prepared for this. For a damn pandemic. These are crazy times.”
  • The Lovebirds (2020): “We’re being chased by murder bees and a pandemic. Let’s just stay down here until it all blows over.”
  • Fighting with My Family (2019): “It’s like trying to do standup in a pandemic. Nobody’s there to appreciate it.”
  • The Kindergarten Teacher (2018): “I was thinking, nowadays, there’s all these diseases, like that bird flu. You know, what if that could spread to humans?”

Key Takeaways

Pandemic puns can bring some much-needed relief and humor during tough times. Through these witty plays on words, we can be reminded that we are all in this together. Whether it’s a short one-liner or a funny pun for kids, there are countless ways to incorporate humor into our daily lives. As movies and TV shows continue to use pandemic-related content, we are reminded that humor is a timeless tool for coping with difficult situations. So next time you need a pick-me-up, try out one of the pandemic puns we’ve compiled in this article. Laughter may just be the best medicine after all.

About the author

Hilly Martin