Puns

99+ Ear Puns to Make You Listen Up!

Ear Puns
Written by Hilly Martin

Do you have an ear for puns? If so, this article will be music to your auditory canals. We’ve compiled a list of ear puns that range from cheesy to hilarious, and we’re confident that you’ll find a few that will tickle your funny bone and leave you grinning from ear to ear.

So, what exactly are ear puns? They’re jokes or wordplay that revolve around the concept of ears. Whether it’s a literal reference to the anatomy of the ear or a more abstract use of the word, ear puns are sure to make you laugh. From one-liners to longer jokes and puns designed for kids, we’ve got you covered. So, sit back, relax, and get ready to hear some of the best ear puns around.

What Are Ear Puns?

Ear puns are a type of wordplay that creates humorous or amusing connections involving the ears. These puns can take many forms, from simple one-liners to elaborate jokes. Whatever the format, ear puns rely on the fact that the word “ear” can have multiple meanings or be combined with other words to create new meanings.

Best Short Ear Puns

  • How does a rabbit keep his ears in good shape? By using a hare dryer.
  • A kangaroo walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’m sorry, we don’t serve kangaroos.” The kangaroo replies, “That’s okay, I just wanted a beer and to listen to the band.”
  • What do you call a cautious ear? An earful.
  • How do you help a musician with two left ears? You need to help them find the right note.
  • Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
  • Guess who’s been listening to my conversations? Skywalker.
  • What noise does a corn make when it laughs? Ears of corn.
  • What do you call a goldfish with only one ear? A hear-o.
  • What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros? Elephino (ear-cup hugging rhinoceros).
  • What do you call a group of soldiers with ear infections? Hear squad.
  • Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
  • What do you call an ear that doesn’t work? A co-ear.
  • What do you call a pirate’s ear that falls off? An earrr.
  • What do you call a rabbit that’s in a hurry? Rush hare.
  • Why was the belt arrested? For holding up pants.
  • What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
  • What do you call an ear that’s always in a hurry? An ear-ly bird.
  • Why do potatoes make the best detectives? Because they keep their ears to the ground.
  • What do you call a space between two ears? A head space.
  • What did the big ear say to the little ear? “Hey, we should start a band!”
  • Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it was feeling crumbly.
  • Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to class? Because her students were so bright.
  • What do you call a donkey with three ears? Whatever you want, he can’t hear you.
  • What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo? Big ears that jump too high.
  • How do you know if a hat is polite? It lifts its brim and says, “Ear, ear.”
Best Short Ear Puns

One-Liner Ear Puns

  • What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine from its ear.
  • Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.
  • If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?
  • Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
  • I can’t hear you! Oh wait, that’s because I’ve got my headphones in.
  • Why did the person with hearing aids sell their phone? They couldn’t hear the ringtone.
  • I’m listening to The Doors, but I can’t find the doorknob.
  • Why do elephants never use computers? Because they’re afraid of mice.
  • What do you get when you cross a bicycle and an ear of corn? A corn cycle.
  • Did you hear about the ears that got married? It was an aural wedding.
  • I tried listening to sea shanties, but my ears just couldn’t handle it.
  • Why did the elephant wear headphones? To listen to his own trumpet solo.
  • I’m trying to create a new type of potato chip with a built-in earbud. I call it the ChipEar.
  • What do you call an ear that’s in charge? The hear-ring.
  • I know these jokes are corny, but I’m all ear for them.
  • Why did Vincent van Gogh cut off his ear? He wanted to make a master ear-piece.
  • Did you hear about the burglars who stole a calendar? They got six months each.
  • Why don’t ants get sick during cold weather? Because they have tiny ant-i-bodies.
  • I can’t hold a tune, but I can hold an ear.
  • What do you call it when you listen to music while exercising? Ear-obics.
  • My music teacher told me to listen to Mozart with an ear-to-ear grin.

Good Funny Puns for Ear

  • I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  • I have a photographic memory, but I always forget to develop it.
  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  • Why don’t seagulls fly by the bay? Because then they’d be called bagels.
  • What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
  • I got a job at the bakery because I kneaded dough.
  • What do you call a magic dog? A Labracadabrador.
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  • I’m reading a book on the history of glue. I just can’t seem to put it down.
  • Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  • I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t raise the dough.
  • What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
  • Why don’t skeletons climb mountains? They don’t have the guts.
  • Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work.
  • I don’t trust people who do acupuncture. They’re back stabbers.
  • What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
  • Why do bees hum? Because they don’t know the words.
  • Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because the “p” is silent.
  • Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
  • What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  • Why don’t vampires brush their teeth? They prefer to fang floss.
  • Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • What do you call a cow that’s just given birth? De-calf-inated.

Catchy Ear Puns for Kids

  • What do you call a bear with no ears? B.
  • Did you hear about the blonde who put headphones on her eyes? She thought she could listen to music with her ears closed.
  • Why do ears need to visit the doctor? To get a check-up.
  • What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
  • What do you call a bird that’s good with money? A quid pro crow.
  • Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the slides.
  • What do you call a parrot that makes jokes? A Polly-tician.
  • Why don’t seagulls fly by the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
  • What kind of music do planets like to listen to? Nep-tunes.
  • What did one ear say to the other? “We’re made for each other.”
  • Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • What did one ear say to the other ear when they were arguing? “Listen to me for a change.”
  • What do you call a snobbish criminal going down stairs? A condescending conDescender.
  • What do you call a snowman when it’s summertime? Puddle.
  • Why don’t astronauts have good manners? Because they eat with their space hands.
  • Why do we tell actors to “break a leg”? Because every play has a cast.
  • What do you get when you cross a snowman and a shark? Frostbite.
  • Why are fish bad at basketball? They can’t dribble.
  • What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
  • Why did the cow go to outer space? To see the moooon.
  • What do you call a cartoon that is moving too slow? A drawing.
  • Why did the kid bring a ladder to the school? Because he heard the classes were on a higher level.
  • What do you do if your balloon floats away? You let it go.
  • What do you get when you cross a snowman and a rabbit? Frosty the snow hare.
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
One-Liner Ear Puns

Best Ear Puns Use in Movies

Ear puns have made their way into popular culture, including movies. Here are some examples of ear puns used in films:

  • In the movie “The Mask,” Jim Carrey’s character says, “Somebody stop me,” while plugging his ears with a pencil eraser.
  • In the movie “Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery,” Austin says, “Allow myself to introduce… myself,” while pulling on his earlobe.
  • In the movie “Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me,” Fat Bastard says, “Do I make you horny? Do I make you randy?” while holding his ear.
  • In the movie “Ratatouille,” Gusteau’s motto is “Anyone can cook,” which is repeated throughout the film and is a play on the French phrase “chacun à son goût,” which means “to each his own taste.”
  • In the movie “Toy Story 2,” Woody’s arm is accidentally ripped, and he exclaims, “There’s a snake in my boot!” while holding his ear in shock.

Key Takeaways

Ear puns are a fun and creative way to play with language and have a good laugh. Whether you’re a fan of one-liners or longer jokes, there’s something for everyone in this list of ear puns. From kids to adults, ear puns can be used to entertain and engage with people of all ages.

So next time you need a good laugh, try telling one of these ear puns to a friend or family member. You never know, it might just be the thing to put a smile on their face. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, and with these ear puns, you’ll be feeling good in no time.

About the author

Hilly Martin