Terrible puns may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but they certainly have their place in the world of humor. And so if you’re looking for some new terrible puns to add to your repertoire, you’ve come to the right place! In case you haven’t noticed, I have a bit of a pun addiction. I can’t help it—I love making bad puns. And I know I’m not alone. In fact, there’s even a subreddit devoted to terrible puns called r/punnery. (Seriously, go check it out.) Last night, I attended a stand-up comedy show and the comedian’s opening bit was all about terrible puns.
It was so bad that it was actually funny. I had never really given much thought to puns before, but now I can’t get them out of my head. Today, Also I’m going to share with you some of the worst puns that I could come up with. Ready? Here we go!
For More: 5 Example of Puns with Examples [Guide]
Funny Terrible Puns
- Where do cows go for entertainment? To the moo-vies.
- What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? A hippo is really heavy, and a Zippo is a little lighter.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- Where do cows go for entertainment? To the moo-vies.
- What did the grape say when it was stepped on? Wine.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- I’m glad I know sign language, it’s pretty handy.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange, Orange who? Orange you going to answer the door or what?
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it was feeling banana-al.
- I’m glad I know sign language, it’s pretty handy.
- What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Dam.
- Why can’t you run through a campground? You can only ran, because it’s past tents.
- Where do milkshakes come from? Nervous cows.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
- What’s the best way to describe it when a woman says “She’s not into you?” She told you she wasn’t the type to watch pre-school shows.
- I used to go fishing with Skrillex. But he kept dropping the bass!
Short Terrible Puns
- What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabe.e!
- Why did the mosquito cross the road? To get to the other side.
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he was feeling a little bit sick.
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
- Why did the chicken go to the seance? To get a new phoenix.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- Do you know what happened when the Pope went to Mount Olive? He got excommunicated.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make? A dino-snore.
- I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
- Did you hear about that new restauraunt called “I screwed your mom”?
- I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
- Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one says to the other, “Let’s get out of here.”
- A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- I have a friend who’s a dietitian, but he can’t stop eating.
- Do you know what it means when a snake sheds its skin? It’s just growing into a bigger boa!
- Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one says to the other, “Let’s get out of here.”
- A man walks into a bar with a steering wheel down his pants.
Top Terrible Puns One liners
- I saw a sign at a gas station that said “Free air”. I asked for a pump.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
- Have you heard about that new restauraunt called “I screwed your mom”?
- I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- I went to buy some camouflage clothing but I couldn’t find any.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
- Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
- What did syrup to the waffle? I love you a waffle lot!
- Do you know why Dracula had no friends? Because he was a pain in the neck!
- Why did the chicken go to the seance? To get a new opinion!
- Why did the duck go to the bank? To get his quack on!
- What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac pray for? I don’t know. A cure for insomnia?
- Why did the girl bring a watermelon to school? Because she wanted to make friends with the teacher!
- Why did the boy bring a dictionary to school? To look up the definition of homework!
- What does a math book and a boyfriend have in common? They’re both hard to understand!
- Why did the boy throw his teachers’ book in the trash? Because he wanted to get an F!
- What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? Rrrrrr!
- Why did the boy go to the dentist? To get a root canal!
- What’s a math teacher’s favorite subject? Arithmetic!
- The quickest way to make antifreeze? Just steal her blanket!
Terrible Puns Captions
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he was feeling banana-d!
- Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He was going to high school!
- Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie!
- I tried to catch some fog, but I mist!
- How do you catch a cheetah? You tie him to a post!
- How do you catch a crab? You bait the hook with something he can’t resist!
- What kind of shoes do spies wear? Sneakers!
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
- What’s a computer’s favorite fruit? Apple!
- I just saw a woman walking a cheetah on a leash. So I thought, “That’s a new one.”
- I told my friend, “I’m thinking of buying a new car.” He said, “What happened to your old one?” I said, “It got discontinued.”
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- I think a lot of people are afraid of change because deep down they know that they’re not really alive.
- I’m reading a book on anti-gravity and it’s really tough to put down!
- Yesterday I saw a chicken crossing the road. I asked him why and he said, “I don’t know. I’ve never done this before.”
- Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fun guy!
- What’s the best way to describe it when a woman says “She’s not into you?” Also It’s like being hit in the face with a cast-iron skillet!
- I’m thinking of buying a new car. My old one got discontinued.
- What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts.
Terrible Puns & Jokes Cringe
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
- What do you call a pig with a PhD? Dr. Ham Porker.
- Every soccer player’s favorite beverage? Penal-tea!
- Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s okay. He woke up!
- What does a bee say to a flower? Hi, honey!
- What’s the best way to describe it when your computer crashes? I’m sorry, I couldn’t compute.
- I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
- I keep telling people that I’m not a robot, but they just don’t believe me.
- What’s a pirate’s favorite fruit? Arrrr-ghetti.
- What kind of key opens a banana? A monkey.
- What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
- How do you catch a cheetah? You tie him to a post!
- Why did the chicken go to the seance? To get a clairvoyant!
- Why did the mosquito cross the road? To get to the other side!
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- How do you catch a rabbit? You tie him to a post!
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it was feeling banana-ll!
- Do you want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind, it’s tearable!
- Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? To get to high school!
- How do you catch a fish? You throw him back in the water!
For More: 105 Funny Puns for Captions & Status
Conclusion
That’s a wrap on our pun-filled blog post! We hope you enjoyed them as much as we did. And so if you need help with , We hope these puns are helpful! Hopefully you found these terrible puns at least a little bit funny. If not, maybe you can take solace in the fact that at least they’re over quickly! Terrible puns may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but they certainly have their place in the world of humor. And so if you’re ever stuck for a conversation starter, you can always fall back on a good old-fashioned terrible pun.
So the next time you’re in a bind, remember: when in doubt, pun it out! So Let us know in the comment section how you liked them, or if you have any other terrible puns to share. In the meantime, keep your eyes peeled for our next blog post on digital marketing tips. So, Thanks for reading!
