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107+ Hilarious Good Puns to Brighten Your Day

Good Puns
Written by Hilly Martin

Are you feeling a little down and in need of a good laugh? Look no further than this compilation of over good puns that are sure to make you smile. A pun is a form of wordplay that exploits multiple meanings of words or phrases, often resulting in a humorous effect. From silly one-liners to clever wordplay, puns can brighten any situation and are guaranteed to put a smile on your face.

In this article, we’ll explore the world of puns, sharing some of the best and most clever puns out there. Whether you’re looking for a quick laugh or want to impress your friends with your wit, these puns are perfect for any occasion.

What are good puns?

A good pun is a joke or play on words that relies on multiple possible meanings of a word or phrase. Puns can be used for many different purposes, including:

  • Humor: Puns are an excellent way to make people laugh, and they can be used as a quick and easy way to lighten the mood.
  • Wordplay: Puns can be used to demonstrate clever wordplay and punsters must be able to come up with puns spontaneously using homophones, innuendos, metaphors and similes
  • Creativity: People enjoy clever wordplay, and puns allow us to demonstrate our creativity in a fun and humorous way.

Best short good puns

  • Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
  • Did you hear about the kidnapping at the park? They woke up.
  • I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  • A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.
  • You can’t run through a campground. You can only ran, because it’s past tents.
  • I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  • Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
  • I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
  • I hate Russian dolls. They’re so full of themselves.
  • I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.
  • Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m OK, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
  • The man who invented Velcro has died. RIP.
  • I couldn’t figure out how to make a car out of spaghetti. Then the meatballs stuck together.
  • Why do some fish live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
  • I didn’t want to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
  • How does Moses make his coffee? Hebrews it.
  • I’m a big fan of whiteboards. They’re re-markable.
  • Did you hear about the chameleon who couldn’t change color? He had a reptile dysfunction.
  • I should have been a comedian. I’ve got a great sense of humor. I also have a great sense of humidity and temperature.
  • You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and think, “What else can I do while I’m down here?”
  • I started a band called 999 Megabytes. We still haven’t gotten a gig yet.
  • The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.
  • I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
Best short good puns

Oneliner good puns

  • I’d tell you a chemistry joke, but I know I wouldn’t get a reaction.
  • What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
  • I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  • Did you hear about the fire at the circus? It was in tents.
  • I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.
  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  • I’m reading a book on the history of glue – I just can’t seem to put it down.
  • I had a dream I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted.
  • I’m not indecisive. Unless you want me to be.
  • I don’t trust You can’t trust atoms. They make up everything.
  • Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they always take things literally.
  • I’m reading a book on gravity, it’s a bit heavy.
  • I’m trying to organize a hide and seek competition but it’s really difficult, good players are hard to find.
  • You can’t have a steak pun because that would be a rare medium well-done.
  • I’m like the sun, I rise when it’s convenient for me.
  • A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
  • I’m emotionally constipated, I haven’t given a crap in weeks.
  • I’m practicing social distancing, even from the letter “S” because it turns a “mile” into a “smile”.
  • I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
  • I knew a guy who collected candy canes, they were all in mint condition.
  • I’m really good at the alphabet, I can do it backwards. ZYX…WVUT…SRQP…ONML…KJIH…GFED…CBA.
  • If you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.

Funny puns for good

  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  • What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament? Live stream.
  • What do you call a snobbish criminal going down stairs? A condescending con descending.
  • What kind of shoes do all spies wear? Sneakers.
  • Did you hear about the restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu, you get what you deserve.
  • Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
  • What do you call a boat that lies on the bottom of the ocean and shakes? A nervous wreck.
  • Why are fish bad at basketball? Because they can’t dribble.
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  • Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin.
  • What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
  • Why don’t aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.
  • Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
  • Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
  • Why don’t oysters donate to charity? They’re shellfish.
  • Why are ghosts bad liars? You can see right through them.
  • Why don’t blind people go skydiving? Because it scares the hell out of their dogs.
  • Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up, it’s fine.
  • I’m trying to start a vegetarian diet, but it’s a missed steak.
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  • Why don’t football players drink tea? Because proper tea is theft.
  • What did the grape say when it got stepped on all day? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
  • What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
  • What kind of bees produce milk? Boobies.
  • Why is it impossible to have a civil war in Norway? They’ve got no guts.

Creative Good puns for kids

  • What do you call a snobbish criminal going down stairs? A condescending con descending.
  • Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall? To make up for his mediocre summer.
  • Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
  • Why did the nurse need a red pen at work? In case she needed to draw blood.
  • Why did the spider go to the computer? To search the web.
  • Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
  • Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the P is silent.
  • Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
  • Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  • What did one hat say to the other? “You stay here, I’ll go on ahead.”
  • Why was the orange afraid to cross the road? It feared getting squeezed.
  • What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
  • What do you give a pig with a sore throat? Oinkment.
  • What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
  • Why did the frog call his insurance company? He had a jump in his car.
  • What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  • What did the grape say when it got stepped on all day? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
  • Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
  • What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
  • Why did the chicken cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t chicken.
  • Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
  • Why was the broom late? It swept in.
  • What kind of prize did the dentist give out? A little plaque.
  • What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? “Where’s popcorn?”
Oneliner good puns

Good puns used in movie

  • “Nobody puts Baby in a corner” – Dirty Dancing
  • “You can’t handle the truth!” – A Few Good Men
  • “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get” – Forrest Gump
  • “Here’s looking at you, kid” – Casablanca
  • “May the Force be with you” – Star Wars
  • “I feel the need… the need for speed” – Top Gun
  • “Say hello to my little friend!” – Scarface
  • “There’s no place like home” – The Wizard of Oz
  • “I see dead people” – The Sixth Sense
  • “It’s not the years, honey, it’s the mileage” – Raiders of the Lost Ark

Conclusion

Puns are an excellent way to inject humor into daily life. Whether it’s through one-liners, animal puns, food puns, or even movie puns, a well-timed pun can really brighten up someone’s day. Puns are clever and witty, and they can be used in many different settings, including conversations with friends, professional settings, and in creative works such as movies and books. So, try incorporating some puns into your everyday life and see if you can make someone smile or laugh. Who knows, you may become the next pun master of your social circle.

About the author

Hilly Martin